Chocolate Jesus, Horny Hanukkah
Date: 12/08/2012
From an erotic Hanukkah menorah lighting ceremony to a breathtaking XXXmas season re-enactment of the miraculous virgin birth of Jesus, from a series of penetrating discussions with pundits and porn stars on “Sex, God & the Holidaze” to a hot game of “Strip Dreidel,” this show is aSaturnalian sexual revelation.
All the major monotheistic religions use mythology and fear to try to control our natural, blooming sexuality, channeling it into procreation instead of recreation. All that control leads to religious sexual abuse, oppression, ignorance, bigotry, hypocrisy and much human misery. On the other hand, it also stimulates erotic rebellion and exhilarating, blasphemous kink. In a sexually twisted society such as ours, you often need the friction of naughty in order to feel nice. So Happy Horny Hanukkah, Merry XXXmas and Ho, Ho, Ho’s for Saturnalia. Celebrate. Fornicate. Investigate.
Featured Guests
Thomas Quinn: My old friend and Emmy-nominated producer, Tom, has written a profound, skeptical and very entertaining book, What Do You Do with a Chocolate Jesus: An Irreverent History of Christianity, which is, along with the season, the inspiration for this show. So…what do you do with a chocolate Jesus? Tom expounds upon the different denominational interpretations, but according to the Church of BonoboVille at the Speakeasy Cathedral, you suck on it! Our chocolate Jesii (cooked to candied perfection by Ana) are a perfect complement to our new golden Jackhammer Jesus from Divine Interventions (which I use with Holy Water Lube on a rising starlet named Yasmine de Leon in the after-party). A “Doubting Thomas” where the Bible is concerned, as most of us are here in BonoboVille, Tom is also a scholar and regales us with stories and insights into the origins of the Roman Saturnalia and the Judeo-Christian spin-offs of Xmas and Hanukkah, along with such sex-unfriendly concepts and rituals as immaculate conception and circumcision. Not just a talking head, Tom shows off his licking tongue during BonoboVille’s version of Communion: Agwa shots off hot porn star nipples. Upon licking the salt off the sacred boob, it turns into the flesh of Jesus and “Doubting Thomas” ascends to heaven! Halleluljah! Praise the Lord and the ladies.
Tasha Reign: AVN award-winning porn star, Penthouse Pet of the Year (2011) and UCLA Women’s Studies major, Tasha became world-famous when a photo of her and two other porn stars with former President Bill Clinton at a Monaco fundraiser went viral. She doesn’t want to talk about Bill though or touch my Bill Clinton dildo (she’d rather play with my big black Devil dong ), though she does admit to being a fan of the former Prez. Aren’t we all? Despite being a stripper and “rough sex” loving porn star (proud of having just done her first anal scene with Peter North in “Girly Girls Like it Rough&rdquo
, Tasha is demure as a novice throughout the show. She does put on a pair of 911panties for Panty Boy, engages the big black Devil dong into an Apocalyptic battle with the Jesus Jackhammer, hugs my candycane-penetrated blow-up sheep (playing the role of Jesus the Lamb of God in this mystery) and dials the speed for Jessie’s wild Sybian ride—her first time on the controls, she admits with shining eyes, and probably not her last.
Jessie Rogers: Last seen on DrSuzy.tv in “SQUIRTACUS MAXIMUS XXXIII: Squirt Salon 33,” Jessiecomes from a whole family of “pastors and stuff like that” who tried to “push” fundamentalist Christianity on her. Funny how religion is often “pushed” like the dangerous ... that it is. Also funny how all that “pushing” so often leads to shoving good people like Jessie away. Now she’s “spiritual,” not religious, searching for answers to the “big questions” through science, yet believing in a “higher power.” She certainly channels that power when she squirts, baptizing us in her Holy Water. In her first game ever of “Strip Dreidel,” Jessie gets the Hebrew letter “hey” which means half, so she takes off half her clothes. The rest soon follow, whereupon she embarks upon a Sybian ride that feels like a “sexorcism,” according to our spiritual ... Jessie. She also provides the show’s deepest revelation, plunging the Divine Interventions Baby Jesus Butt Plug into her lovely anus (as the preacher cried, “Jesus is in her now!&rdquo and removing it slowly, making us realize that this could be the explanation for the virgin birth! After all, if all you do is oral and anal, you’ll still be a virgin; at least, that’s what the Catholic school girls told me.
CLICK HERE TO CONTINUE READING........
Date: 12/08/2012
From an erotic Hanukkah menorah lighting ceremony to a breathtaking XXXmas season re-enactment of the miraculous virgin birth of Jesus, from a series of penetrating discussions with pundits and porn stars on “Sex, God & the Holidaze” to a hot game of “Strip Dreidel,” this show is aSaturnalian sexual revelation.
All the major monotheistic religions use mythology and fear to try to control our natural, blooming sexuality, channeling it into procreation instead of recreation. All that control leads to religious sexual abuse, oppression, ignorance, bigotry, hypocrisy and much human misery. On the other hand, it also stimulates erotic rebellion and exhilarating, blasphemous kink. In a sexually twisted society such as ours, you often need the friction of naughty in order to feel nice. So Happy Horny Hanukkah, Merry XXXmas and Ho, Ho, Ho’s for Saturnalia. Celebrate. Fornicate. Investigate.
Featured Guests
Thomas Quinn: My old friend and Emmy-nominated producer, Tom, has written a profound, skeptical and very entertaining book, What Do You Do with a Chocolate Jesus: An Irreverent History of Christianity, which is, along with the season, the inspiration for this show. So…what do you do with a chocolate Jesus? Tom expounds upon the different denominational interpretations, but according to the Church of BonoboVille at the Speakeasy Cathedral, you suck on it! Our chocolate Jesii (cooked to candied perfection by Ana) are a perfect complement to our new golden Jackhammer Jesus from Divine Interventions (which I use with Holy Water Lube on a rising starlet named Yasmine de Leon in the after-party). A “Doubting Thomas” where the Bible is concerned, as most of us are here in BonoboVille, Tom is also a scholar and regales us with stories and insights into the origins of the Roman Saturnalia and the Judeo-Christian spin-offs of Xmas and Hanukkah, along with such sex-unfriendly concepts and rituals as immaculate conception and circumcision. Not just a talking head, Tom shows off his licking tongue during BonoboVille’s version of Communion: Agwa shots off hot porn star nipples. Upon licking the salt off the sacred boob, it turns into the flesh of Jesus and “Doubting Thomas” ascends to heaven! Halleluljah! Praise the Lord and the ladies.
Tasha Reign: AVN award-winning porn star, Penthouse Pet of the Year (2011) and UCLA Women’s Studies major, Tasha became world-famous when a photo of her and two other porn stars with former President Bill Clinton at a Monaco fundraiser went viral. She doesn’t want to talk about Bill though or touch my Bill Clinton dildo (she’d rather play with my big black Devil dong ), though she does admit to being a fan of the former Prez. Aren’t we all? Despite being a stripper and “rough sex” loving porn star (proud of having just done her first anal scene with Peter North in “Girly Girls Like it Rough&rdquo, Tasha is demure as a novice throughout the show. She does put on a pair of 911panties for Panty Boy, engages the big black Devil dong into an Apocalyptic battle with the Jesus Jackhammer, hugs my candycane-penetrated blow-up sheep (playing the role of Jesus the Lamb of God in this mystery) and dials the speed for Jessie’s wild Sybian ride—her first time on the controls, she admits with shining eyes, and probably not her last.
Jessie Rogers: Last seen on DrSuzy.tv in “SQUIRTACUS MAXIMUS XXXIII: Squirt Salon 33,” Jessiecomes from a whole family of “pastors and stuff like that” who tried to “push” fundamentalist Christianity on her. Funny how religion is often “pushed” like the dangerous ... that it is. Also funny how all that “pushing” so often leads to shoving good people like Jessie away. Now she’s “spiritual,” not religious, searching for answers to the “big questions” through science, yet believing in a “higher power.” She certainly channels that power when she squirts, baptizing us in her Holy Water. In her first game ever of “Strip Dreidel,” Jessie gets the Hebrew letter “hey” which means half, so she takes off half her clothes. The rest soon follow, whereupon she embarks upon a Sybian ride that feels like a “sexorcism,” according to our spiritual ... Jessie. She also provides the show’s deepest revelation, plunging the Divine Interventions Baby Jesus Butt Plug into her lovely anus (as the preacher cried, “Jesus is in her now!&rdquo and removing it slowly, making us realize that this could be the explanation for the virgin birth! After all, if all you do is oral and anal, you’ll still be a virgin; at least, that’s what the Catholic school girls told me.
CLICK HERE TO CONTINUE READING........
