“If you don’t swing, don’t ring!” Or as they say in Latin, “Si Non Oscillas, Noli Tintinnare.” And that’s what the sign said above the big mahogany door of that famous Mansion in Holmby Hills throughout the swinging days of the Sexual Revolution. Of course, you can “tintinnare” my mansion anytime (and my number is 213-670-0066 ), whether you engage in full-scale swap, soft-swing, kinky play, cuckolding, spicy vanilla, are swing-curious, or if you just want to tune into some sexy and sensual guests who like to swing it their way. And there are so many ways to swing—from couples gathering in a stately home for an orgy to porn stars who balance intimate relationships with wild sex scenes to a polyamorous threesome in love.
Swinging is nothing new. In fact, we probably lived a much more swinging lifestyle before the Neolithic spark of modern civilization—with its concepts of property and ownership, and efforts to control the fertility of the land, crops, livestock—and women. With the advent of agriculture about 12,000 years ago, human culture slammed down the mallet on our naturally open sexuality and made monogamy the mainstream state of things. For more on the fascinating changes that human sexuality has gone through over the past hundred millennia or so, check out one of my favorite books, Sex At Dawn: The Prehistoric Origins of Modern Sexuality by three-time DrSuzy.tv guests, Drs. Christopher Ryan and Cacilda Jethá.
Like our kissing cousins the bonobos who swing with each other as well as through the trees, we human apes are more naturally promiscuous than monogamous. Swinging isn’t the perfect solution for everyone, but it’s a lot more honest than cheating, not to mention more fun than stewing in monogamy fermented to monotony. But sharing an intimate relationship with one special person has its benefits. It provides a partner, a best friend, a witness to your life, someone with whom to share your deepest pleasures and sorrows, even if you don’t exclusively share every single erotic activity. For instance, next Saturday, Max and I are celebrating 21 years of lawfully wedded, “monogamish” (thank you for that marvelous term, Dan Savage) sex and love. Don’t miss it! In the meantime, enjoy this swinging show, consider the rainbow of erotic options available to you and…swing it your way!
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