Advice from the Ladies

My wife is in charge.  I asked her to be.  It's taken time, but she is getting more dominant all the time.  Reluctantly so.  I have told her as she is in charge and I am submissive, it is her right to have any dalliance she sees fit.  Upon first learning of this freedom, she was angry and responded very negatively.  I have assured her this is not my way of asking for permission to see other women, and after several discussions, I think I have convinced her of that.  The seed was planted though.  Recently, she has said she likes the idea that if she wants to bed another man, she can without reprecussion where her husband is concerned.  She has said it might happen someday, if it does, it does.  Seems we're making progress, no?

It seems I have two problems now:

1)  She has asked twice why I would want her to ... with other men when she is so territorial of me.  I know the reasons.  The sexual component, as she is desirable and I know I would find her more so to see or know she is with another man.  A visual and fantasy driven man, the sight of her in the throes of passion would be wondrous to me.  There is also the psychological as I am very submissive to her.  I enjoy her authority and control as well as being humiliated by her.  There is no greater way to show her dominance over me than to take another lover with my knowledge and her demanding my condoning and acceptance of the fact.  There is the emotional; the sweet jeolousy pushing me to want to please her.  I have not truly experienced it but imagined it.  I also believe it would strengthen our marraige because of the increased communication which would be required to make it work.  I'm not sure how to answer this question, which I know needs answering, without sounding needy, pushy or contrived.  I'm not sure she would buy the argument that her indescretions would be a boon to our relationship.

2)  In addition to the "why" question, she has asked what she has to gain sexually.  I'm not small.  In fact, I am very well endowed, nearly 10" measured propery.  Girth is close to 2".  I am a competant and giving lover.  She has a point.  The likely scenario has her laying with a lesser man so to speak.  Or a lateral move at best.  The % of men larger than me is very small.  She is not a size queen, and there is definitely more to sex than his size, but how to get past this?

I really think I need a woman's perspective, I've already got the male side down pat.  What say you girls?